


he succeeded

by mayaaminmin



Category: Doctor Strange (2016), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Spoilers, Blink And You Miss It Slash, Canon Compliant, Drowning, Drug Abuse, Gen, Hurt No Comfort, Hurt Stephen Strange, Insecure Stephen Strange, Minor Tony Stark/Stephen Strange, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Post-Canon, Stephen Strange & Wong Friendship, Stephen Strange Dies, Suicide, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:08:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23838865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mayaaminmin/pseuds/mayaaminmin
Summary: Stephen Strange had considered it twice and nearly succeeded once.
Relationships: Stephen Strange & Wong, Tony Stark & Stephen Strange
Kudos: 35





	he succeeded

Stephen Strange had considered it twice and nearly succeeded once.

The first time he considered it, he was standing before the lake where his sister drowned. He drowned that day as well; the guilt was so suffocating that he'd considered joining her ghost in the watery depths.

The second time he considered it, he was running dangerously low on money and he was no closer to healing his hands. He was in a deep depression and he couldn’t find the way out. He’d lost all hope in salvaging his hands and had lost his purpose in life as well; he’d grabbed the bottle of painkillers and nearly swallowed them all in a desperate attempt to make the pain finally stop.

The time he nearly succeeded, he was huddled over an old book in the sanctum’s library and poring over the strange and magical texts. The words were swimming before his eyes and he was on the brink of collapsing, but still, he refused to rest. Each time he closed his eyes, he saw nothing but endless chaos and darkness. Sleeping would bring him no relief, and he didn’t wish to relive even one of the countless deaths he’d endured. Grating taunts and cruel whispers and memories of his dying screams plagued his mind. He’d summoned the Sword of the Seraphim and eyed the glowing weapon protruding from his hands before plunging it into his own chest. He’d nearly sliced his heart open, but before he knew it a hand was against his temple and he collapsed against the Cloak of Levitation. The last thing he saw was Wong yanking out the bright weapon protruding from his chest.

Now, he was sitting on one of the couches below the giant window of the seal of the New York sanctum. Stephen closed his eyes and saw warm brown eyes and a soul that burned so brightly, but was snuffed out too soon. He refused to cry as he whispered his final words.

"I’m sorry, Tony. I hope you can forgive me.” 

He took a deep breath and began the intricate motions of the final spell he'd ever learn. The cloak hovered silently nearby but didn’t try to stop him. White symbols sparked to life before his hands and burned with acrid black smoke. The cloak settled firmly on his shoulders, supporting him as he began to sag and ready to catch him once he was finished. Stephen drew the intricate symbols carefully over his chest, eyes, mouth, and forehead, making sure each once was perfect, before saying the word and completing the spell.

The symbols flashed brightly once and produced a shockwave of energy so strong that it reached the ends of the earth and further. Wong raced to the source and found Stephen lying on his back along the length of the couch, his face slack and his hands positioned over his stomach as if he’d simply fallen asleep. The cloak was hovering solemnly nearby. Wong didn’t say a word as tears began to spill down his face.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sad and working through some things so bear with me please :<
> 
> Anyway, I hope you enjoyed! Kudos and comments are appreciated! You can find me on my tumblr for any new fics I post (my @ is in my profile)


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